Wednesday, March 24, 2010
She had it coming...
The best bit of photo editing I've done in a while. Of course, Matt Sherry would never shank a sweet northern rose like Nikki. Never.
Labels: COMRADES, IMAGES, MISDEEDS
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Happy St Pat's!
I had an article to write and I find that Paddy's Night reaches a level of crassness that puts Christmas in the shade.
I did, however, commemorate the occasion in my own fashion.
Behold, the jelly tricolore.
I did, however, commemorate the occasion in my own fashion.
Behold, the jelly tricolore.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Xmas decs!
What did Adam say the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve!
Thursday, October 29, 2009
1:45:45
Two miles to go and profoundly little danger of the photo being blurred by my speed.
Labels: IMAGES, SELF IMPROVEMENT
Saturday, July 04, 2009
It's Russ's stag do today
And to honour the occasion, Tim and I will be wearing commemorative wifebeaters.
More on this noble 4th July tradition
More on this noble 4th July tradition
Labels: COMRADES, IMAGES, MISDEEDS
Friday, April 24, 2009
God spoke to me, via a beermat
Monday, December 29, 2008
The road less travelled
Leon and I went up to Manchester for a Saturday night reunion piss-up with Real Osaka team mates Mark Bailey (back from Osaka for a Xmas visit) and Tom Dylan (now a local councillor, although I'm a little unclear as to the locale.)
The journey up was frustratingly slow, but not too fraught as we were in fine spirits. I didn't much fancy the prospect of the M6 on the way home, though. Therefore, I dug out my slightly-damp atlas from the boot of the car, entrusted it to Leon, and bade him navigate us a route back.
"Dan, I thought you said this atlas was damp? It's soaking."
He did a good job getting us home, though: we came back on winding roads through the Peak District, which took hours upon hours, but was a great deal more soothing for the soul than going through Staffordshire at 25 mph on a three-lane motorway.
Somewhere up a hill in the Peak District
Leon glad to be wearing his coat inside the car
A view that bests that of the RAC centre, as seen from the M6
The journey up was frustratingly slow, but not too fraught as we were in fine spirits. I didn't much fancy the prospect of the M6 on the way home, though. Therefore, I dug out my slightly-damp atlas from the boot of the car, entrusted it to Leon, and bade him navigate us a route back.
"Dan, I thought you said this atlas was damp? It's soaking."
He did a good job getting us home, though: we came back on winding roads through the Peak District, which took hours upon hours, but was a great deal more soothing for the soul than going through Staffordshire at 25 mph on a three-lane motorway.
Somewhere up a hill in the Peak District
Leon glad to be wearing his coat inside the car
A view that bests that of the RAC centre, as seen from the M6
Friday, October 24, 2008
Baby jousting
Took a road trip to Sheffield this week to see Kate, Clive and the nieces...
...pots of gold along the way...
...Kianna was as cheery as ever...
...and Eva still looks like one of those troll dolls.
Kianna's not scared of heights...
...and is developing quite a taste for dandruff...
Baby jousting! As you can see, Kianna has the upper hand.
(Kate is simply hoping to be left with two whole and healthy daughters at the end of my visit.)
Even after I kicked her ass at the baby jousting, Eva still won't give me the time of day.
...pots of gold along the way...
...Kianna was as cheery as ever...
...and Eva still looks like one of those troll dolls.
Kianna's not scared of heights...
...and is developing quite a taste for dandruff...
Baby jousting! As you can see, Kianna has the upper hand.
(Kate is simply hoping to be left with two whole and healthy daughters at the end of my visit.)
Even after I kicked her ass at the baby jousting, Eva still won't give me the time of day.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Fail!
The paper was full of gems today: a picture of a Japanese synchronised swimmer being loaded onto a stretcher after hyperventilating in the pool was a good start. The above is the winner, though: a Cuban fighter expressing his disapproval of the refereeing in the Taekwondo, via the medium of, well, Taekwondo!
I suppose we should consider ourselves fortunate that he wasn't competing in the archery; and to think that yesterday I was criticising the tennis players for their lack of Olympic spirit.
Friday, May 02, 2008
Snaps!
Mike and Junko O'Hanley: shortly to leave Japan. Mike failed to win "player of the tournament" in his first run out for Real Osaka, but Junko won best WAG in one of the most secret ballots going.
How the day finished: busking in a weird metal structure located in the middle of one of Osaka's busiest junctions.
Dan gets some birthday zen on.
The stuff Ed brought over from China (smuggled in one of his more spacious orifices) was absolutely rank: it tasted like someone had peed in a jar of peardrops, left it for a week, then peed in it again. One of the characters on the bottle translated as "running" tears, and it wasn't too difficult to figure out why.
Woke up at 2:30am on my birthday (after about 90 minutes of sleep) to go and watch Man Utd vs Barcelona at Murphys, more beer, more running tears pee-peardrop solution, more sleep, then trekked out to see Gamba Osaka. This mascot is doubly scary when you consider that there are children inside it.
Got to bed at midnight, then back out of bed at 3:00 for Chelsea vs Liverpool. My cup runneth over.
Labels: IMAGES
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Facebook photo fest
I have discovered a new love of Facebook. Originally I was opposed to the removal of the automatic "is" from the status bar, reasoning that tighter rules of composition can sometimes stimulate creativity; take Haiku, for example.
However, being able to set my status to "has removed you from his friends list" has kept me laughing since this time yesterday. Genius, if I do say so myself.
Oh, anyway, there's photos too:
Kyushu with Joe
Kobe and Kyoto with Joe
Hanami with a hangover
However, being able to set my status to "has removed you from his friends list" has kept me laughing since this time yesterday. Genius, if I do say so myself.
Oh, anyway, there's photos too:
Kyushu with Joe
Kobe and Kyoto with Joe
Hanami with a hangover
Labels: BUNKA, CLAN, COMRADES, IMAGES, TRAVEL
Friday, April 04, 2008
Kyushu photos
Here's a few snaps of me and Joe on our Kyushu jaunt. We visited Fukuoka and Nagasaki. There'll be more to follow on facebook and this page after I'm finally rid of the shag-haired villain and able to get down to some serious geekery again.
Notes for the non-Nippon literate: Kyushu is the southernmost of Japan's four main islands. It takes about twelve hours by ferry from Osaka. And the Softbank Hawks suck.
The boat to Moji.
Joe's bed.
My bed.
(We got upgraded from economy floorspace!)
Fukuoka: Joe was suitably impressed with the o-hanami.
Nagasaki: a temple.
The Japanese phrase for "two peas in a pod" is uri futatsu, meaning "two melons."
Go on, say it...
Fine weather in Nagasaki peace park (peace statue in the background.)
The one-legged torii gate in Nagasaki. No prizes for guessing what happened to the other leg.
The 26 Christian martyrs of Japan (go on, count them!)
These were crucified in Nagasaki in 1597 after the shogunate had decided that having Christians about the place wasn't a good idea.
More snaps to follow!
Notes for the non-Nippon literate: Kyushu is the southernmost of Japan's four main islands. It takes about twelve hours by ferry from Osaka. And the Softbank Hawks suck.
The boat to Moji.
Joe's bed.
My bed.
(We got upgraded from economy floorspace!)
Fukuoka: Joe was suitably impressed with the o-hanami.
Nagasaki: a temple.
The Japanese phrase for "two peas in a pod" is uri futatsu, meaning "two melons."
Go on, say it...
Fine weather in Nagasaki peace park (peace statue in the background.)
The one-legged torii gate in Nagasaki. No prizes for guessing what happened to the other leg.
The 26 Christian martyrs of Japan (go on, count them!)
These were crucified in Nagasaki in 1597 after the shogunate had decided that having Christians about the place wasn't a good idea.
More snaps to follow!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Facebook photos
Rightio readers, I'm going to be putting links to my facebook albums in the bar on the right from now on, so even non-facebook folks can enjoy the foolery.
Thus far, we have:
Real Osaka
Independence Day
Brendan & Milly's wedding
Enjoy!
Thus far, we have:
Real Osaka
Independence Day
Brendan & Milly's wedding
Enjoy!
Labels: IMAGES, TRASHED ELBOW
Friday, August 31, 2007
3-day weekend, no actual breakages
Vivre was closed for a stock-take and Dan got a three-day weekend. Here's how it went:
Thursday
Off to Mount Fuji! I'd been meaning to do this since I came to Japan, but never quite got round to it.
Arrived at Shin-Fuji station and my first thought was: Damn, that's a big mountain. Came out of the station and thought: Hey, where did it go? It seems that in the summer Fuji is only fleetingly visible, disappearing behind cloud for long stretches of time.
I climbed Fuji on the Fujinomiya-Mishima route, starting from the 5th station. It should be noted that I win zero points for originality here- everyone climbs from 5th station, because it's a lot less hassle; and everyone from western Japan climbs the Fujinomiya route because it's a heinous pain in the anus to get to any of the other routes. I was deeply saddened not to be able to take the purportedly-scenic Yoshida route, as orgasmed over relentlessly by the Lonely Planet.
Full of zest, I set off from 5th station at 8pm and fairly hoofed it up the mountain. It wasn't too cold, but there was a kind of nasty, persistent sideways moisture that was making light work of my laughably-titled waterproofs.
Maybe due to speed of ascent/ lack of acclimatisation, I started to get a bit of a headache just before the 8th station, but I decided to press on to the 9th before taking shelter, which would leave me an easier walk in the morning. The temperature dropped as I blundered about groggily on the damp rocks in the murky darkness, but I had the best torch a thousand yen can buy. Plus, there was lightning. Did I mention the lightning? It was cool.
Finally got to the 9th station and coughed up half my wallet for the chance to bed down in the crawlspace with some complete strangers.
Friday
Alarm woke me up at 0245 hours and I enjoyed(!) a light breakfast of "Topvalu" (sic) shortbread, before setting out at 0320 in frankly minging conditions (plus the sodden clothes I'd been only too happy to divest myself of a few short hours previously.) Although it was bitterly cold and windy, the fleeting glimpses of the stars above, mirroring the lights of early-morning Fuji city below, were probably the best view of the weekend.
I got to the top at 0415, and parked my arse in the nearest available cabin, surrounded by weedy jackasses slurping oxygen out of expensive cannisters. I had it on good authority that the sun would come up at 0430 on the dot. (Ah Japanese sun: is very punctual Gaijin-san.) As to whether it did or not, I really couldn't say: the dense clouds swilling around the summit frustrated my hopes of seeing the dawn from Mount Fuji. I didn't really mind though. I did a couple of laps of the crater (second was much easier: the conditions were beginning to improve.) The cloud started to thin out and I got a decent view of the forests way down at the bottom of the mountain.
Sadly, my camera crapped out on me, so the following farcical photos are courtesy of the Ferrari phone:
Having had my fill of Fuji-san, I hopped it back down the Fujinomiya trail, noting the ant-like procession of people on their way up.
Reasons why doing a night-climb is a good idea:
-Less traffic.
-Not so hot.
-You can't see anything, least of all how much of the bloody mountain you've got left to climb.
-You don't have to talk to anybody.
Got back to Shin-Fuji station around 2pm, turned round to steal a last glimpse of Fuji-san, but, true to form, the mountain was hidden from sight once more behind the veil of cloud.
***
Friday was far from finished though: there was still BEER NIGHT at the Osaka Dome. In order to take the patrons' minds off the paucity of baseball on display, the Osaka Dome infrequently holds Beer Nights (200 yen a beer, son!)
Sadly, it was a low-scoring game, but we did get the unlooked-for bonus of the 10th innings, by which time I was well and truly sozzled.
Saturday
The opening of the Athletics World Championships in Osaka! Overslept, but still made it down to Osaka-jo park in time to watch the leaders of the marathon come through. Went for breakfast with Adam, got back to the park and found that my bicycle had been nicked. The Stag was a freebie present from Andrew when I moved into the Chez Shinsaibashi. Even so, I was a bit miffed to be parted from it. I sincerely hope that it was stolen by the last-placed runner, who just couldn't be asked to persevere in the inhumanely warm Osaka conditions.
***
Three-day weekend damage report:
Extremely sore legs: 2
Remaining bicylcles: 0
Remaining cash: don't ask
Mystery gash and bruising on one arm, presumably sustained during or after Beer Night.
Actual breakages: 0
Thursday
Off to Mount Fuji! I'd been meaning to do this since I came to Japan, but never quite got round to it.
Arrived at Shin-Fuji station and my first thought was: Damn, that's a big mountain. Came out of the station and thought: Hey, where did it go? It seems that in the summer Fuji is only fleetingly visible, disappearing behind cloud for long stretches of time.
I climbed Fuji on the Fujinomiya-Mishima route, starting from the 5th station. It should be noted that I win zero points for originality here- everyone climbs from 5th station, because it's a lot less hassle; and everyone from western Japan climbs the Fujinomiya route because it's a heinous pain in the anus to get to any of the other routes. I was deeply saddened not to be able to take the purportedly-scenic Yoshida route, as orgasmed over relentlessly by the Lonely Planet.
Full of zest, I set off from 5th station at 8pm and fairly hoofed it up the mountain. It wasn't too cold, but there was a kind of nasty, persistent sideways moisture that was making light work of my laughably-titled waterproofs.
Maybe due to speed of ascent/ lack of acclimatisation, I started to get a bit of a headache just before the 8th station, but I decided to press on to the 9th before taking shelter, which would leave me an easier walk in the morning. The temperature dropped as I blundered about groggily on the damp rocks in the murky darkness, but I had the best torch a thousand yen can buy. Plus, there was lightning. Did I mention the lightning? It was cool.
Finally got to the 9th station and coughed up half my wallet for the chance to bed down in the crawlspace with some complete strangers.
Friday
Alarm woke me up at 0245 hours and I enjoyed(!) a light breakfast of "Topvalu" (sic) shortbread, before setting out at 0320 in frankly minging conditions (plus the sodden clothes I'd been only too happy to divest myself of a few short hours previously.) Although it was bitterly cold and windy, the fleeting glimpses of the stars above, mirroring the lights of early-morning Fuji city below, were probably the best view of the weekend.
I got to the top at 0415, and parked my arse in the nearest available cabin, surrounded by weedy jackasses slurping oxygen out of expensive cannisters. I had it on good authority that the sun would come up at 0430 on the dot. (Ah Japanese sun: is very punctual Gaijin-san.) As to whether it did or not, I really couldn't say: the dense clouds swilling around the summit frustrated my hopes of seeing the dawn from Mount Fuji. I didn't really mind though. I did a couple of laps of the crater (second was much easier: the conditions were beginning to improve.) The cloud started to thin out and I got a decent view of the forests way down at the bottom of the mountain.
Sadly, my camera crapped out on me, so the following farcical photos are courtesy of the Ferrari phone:
 | A torii gate on the mountain, far above the clouds. |
 | The unprepossessing arrangement of pebbles which marks the very highest point of Fuji-san. |
 | Dan, sporting Canucks hat and kag-in-a-bag over jacket from "What Everyone Wants" |
Having had my fill of Fuji-san, I hopped it back down the Fujinomiya trail, noting the ant-like procession of people on their way up.
Reasons why doing a night-climb is a good idea:
-Less traffic.
-Not so hot.
-You can't see anything, least of all how much of the bloody mountain you've got left to climb.
-You don't have to talk to anybody.
Got back to Shin-Fuji station around 2pm, turned round to steal a last glimpse of Fuji-san, but, true to form, the mountain was hidden from sight once more behind the veil of cloud.
***
Friday was far from finished though: there was still BEER NIGHT at the Osaka Dome. In order to take the patrons' minds off the paucity of baseball on display, the Osaka Dome infrequently holds Beer Nights (200 yen a beer, son!)
Sadly, it was a low-scoring game, but we did get the unlooked-for bonus of the 10th innings, by which time I was well and truly sozzled.
Saturday
The opening of the Athletics World Championships in Osaka! Overslept, but still made it down to Osaka-jo park in time to watch the leaders of the marathon come through. Went for breakfast with Adam, got back to the park and found that my bicycle had been nicked. The Stag was a freebie present from Andrew when I moved into the Chez Shinsaibashi. Even so, I was a bit miffed to be parted from it. I sincerely hope that it was stolen by the last-placed runner, who just couldn't be asked to persevere in the inhumanely warm Osaka conditions.
***
Three-day weekend damage report:
Extremely sore legs: 2
Remaining bicylcles: 0
Remaining cash: don't ask
Mystery gash and bruising on one arm, presumably sustained during or after Beer Night.
Actual breakages: 0
Labels: IMAGES, MISDEEDS, NATURE, TRAVEL
Monday, July 16, 2007
Evidently a quick learner
Mwahahahhaha!!!
I've corrupted the baby! Check it out... folks...
I've corrupted the baby! Check it out... folks...
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Next generation
Monday, July 09, 2007
Lucky Se7en the second
Saturday also gave me my first chance to meet face-to-face with Kate's baby, Kianna. Took a bunch of photos, but this one's definitely the best (darkest).
Told Joe that if he ever brings out an album, this has to be the cover photo. And the album's title has to be "My lucky day."
Told Joe that if he ever brings out an album, this has to be the cover photo. And the album's title has to be "My lucky day."
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Lucky Se7en
Congratulations to Brendan and Milly, married on 7/7/07. Best wishes for a happy future.
A real lucky seven as it turned out: the first day the weather's behaved itself this year.
Friday, July 06, 2007
Independence Day T-shirts!
Adam was kind enough to invite Wes and me to his Independence Day barbecue, despite our being Canadian and British respectively.
We felt we ought to do something to extend the olive branch...
Labels: IMAGES
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Bad medicine
Found this mysterious medication sitting on the desk at work. No one answered when I asked who'd been taking twat tablets. What's more, they've sat there untouched ever since.
I guess the side effects are probably no laughing matter. Whoever it is is keeping the now-legendary low profile.
Labels: IMAGES
