Thursday, December 18, 2008
The significance of the Christmas decs
When last I spent Christmas in the UK, the mum had a trip to Barcelona booked midway through December.
While she was away, I went round her house and decorated it for the festive season as a surprise for her return, earning myself much goodwill: so much, in fact, that six years later on the mum still remembers it fondly, even though I initially drew a complete blank when she mentioned it to me the other day.
It just goes to show: a judicious tenner in Wilkinsons at Christmas can take the sting off many a missed Mother's Day.
Another time, another house: it fell upon me to put the decs up in the back room this year. I was equipped with twelve baubles and five gaudy scroll thingies which were to be suspended from the ceiling by various lengths of cotton.
I made a big production of allocating each bauble a sign of the Chinese zodiac, and arranging them with the five scrolls representing the five elements. (That's right: I said five.)
I think Joe and Mum cottoned on to the fact that I was just sticking the things up any old how, but it didn't hurt to weave a little myth making into the process.
As usual, our levity bordered somewhat on the rancorous:
JOE: You've only stuck that pin halfway in, you weakling!
ME: I'll stick my ---- all the way up your ---- in a minute.
MUM: Daniel!!!
Judging by Joe's delighted reaction, I'd say he's had worse offers.
While she was away, I went round her house and decorated it for the festive season as a surprise for her return, earning myself much goodwill: so much, in fact, that six years later on the mum still remembers it fondly, even though I initially drew a complete blank when she mentioned it to me the other day.
It just goes to show: a judicious tenner in Wilkinsons at Christmas can take the sting off many a missed Mother's Day.
Another time, another house: it fell upon me to put the decs up in the back room this year. I was equipped with twelve baubles and five gaudy scroll thingies which were to be suspended from the ceiling by various lengths of cotton.
I made a big production of allocating each bauble a sign of the Chinese zodiac, and arranging them with the five scrolls representing the five elements. (That's right: I said five.)
I think Joe and Mum cottoned on to the fact that I was just sticking the things up any old how, but it didn't hurt to weave a little myth making into the process.
As usual, our levity bordered somewhat on the rancorous:
JOE: You've only stuck that pin halfway in, you weakling!
ME: I'll stick my ---- all the way up your ---- in a minute.
MUM: Daniel!!!
Judging by Joe's delighted reaction, I'd say he's had worse offers.
