Friday, October 20, 2006

 

"Charles..?"

I achieved my first mission of the day: got down to the Toho cinema and watched X-Men 3. I didn't expect a great deal from it, so I wasn't too disappointed; it would have been more faithful to the comic if Wolverine had acted like more of a prick though.

Japanese audiences have a tendency to sit through all of the end titles; I did so too, but this was because I wanted to check that nothing had fallen out of my pockets in the darkness. Imagine me clicking my tongue in irritation when, lo and behold, there's an extra scene at the end of the credits.

What looks like a very plush hospital room, male patient in classic coma situation. Enter nurse.

HE: Good morning, "Moira."

SHE: Charles..?


And to the reader who says "Hold on Dan- shouldn't you have included a spoiler warning there?" I say: that's ok, you can thank me later, for I despise this cheap bullshit trick whereby paying customers are forced to sit through all the credits, despite their full bladder, only to be rewarded with some mundane crap "twist" like the above.

If you're going to pull this kind of shit, just run the end credits halfway through the film and have done with it.

***


I raised my eyebrows somewhat when, halfway through the cast listing, and long after such leading lights as Magneto, Storm and Juggernaut had taken their bows, the names of Lawnmower man and Waterhose man cropped up. In all the excitement that particular deathmatch must have passed me by.

I can't say their special powers sound too promising though.

Unless, of course, you value a well-kept garden.

Comments:
and what the fuck is wrong with a well kept garden?
 
Dan, reply to your emails you little shit.

Osakajoe, there's nothing wrong with a well kept garden.

Lewis.
 
Nothing that can't be solved with a bin bag and a flamethrower.
 
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