Trashed elbow

Singer Brian Harvey is in a critical condition in an east London hospital after he fell under the wheels of his own car, police have said.
Singer Harvey 'crushed under car'
BBC,Tuesday, 31 May, 2005

I've witnessed some heinous boy-band stupidity (think: Mark Owen's solo career), but managing to reverse a Mercedes over oneself is quite an impressive feat by anyone's standards. I hope he makes a full recovery and is a little more careful in future.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the globe...

An elderly Australian couple evaded police on a 1,400 mile journey by car and bus after setting off in protest when the wife was denied an extension of her driving license because of old age.
Elderly couple leads police on merry hunt
Reuters, Thu Jun 2, 2005

Heart-warming stuff, although I raised my eyebrows when I read that the octogenarian fugitives both suffered from "varying degrees of dementia." Probably time to hang up those car keys, Peter Pan.

On a completely unrelated note, I picked up a cheap-ass English phrasebook yesterday. If this seems like a bizarre thing for me to do, it's because I can read just about enough Japanese writing to make some sense of the phrases that are being translated. And I noticed this particularly rivetting exchange as one of the modelled conversations:

A: What are you doing here?
B: Shut up. Don't move!
A: What do you want?
B: Give me all the money you have.

So, if you want some useful Japanese phrases for the streets of Neyagawa, here they are, rendered into my best romaji:

Urusai: shut up.
Ugoku na: don't move.
Ari-gane zenbu yokose: give me all your money.

The most important thing with communication in an unfamiliar language is don't be afraid of making mistakes. Besides, if you're brandishing a katana or a pointed stick or similar, I daresay your victim will get the idea.

Use it wisely, folks!