Thursday, November 04, 2004
Oh joy...
It's official: the whole world's going to Hell in a handbasket. Therefore, I'm leaving.
I've been offered a job teaching English on the planet Sedna. The dominant species on Sedna is the Gurontia, a belligerent race of giant lizard men, whose defining characteristics are described by the Galactic Tourism Board's leaflet as "bad breath, insanity and cannibalism." I will be teaching classes of up to 6 warlords at a time.
Due to the vast time periods currently required for interplanetary travel, I will have to be cryogenically frozen for the trip to my new planet, so by the time I next update this blog, you will all be dead and so will your children's children.
Good night and God bless the United States of America.
I've been offered a job teaching English on the planet Sedna. The dominant species on Sedna is the Gurontia, a belligerent race of giant lizard men, whose defining characteristics are described by the Galactic Tourism Board's leaflet as "bad breath, insanity and cannibalism." I will be teaching classes of up to 6 warlords at a time.
Due to the vast time periods currently required for interplanetary travel, I will have to be cryogenically frozen for the trip to my new planet, so by the time I next update this blog, you will all be dead and so will your children's children.
Good night and God bless the United States of America.
