Sunday, October 31, 2004

 

How cool is this??

So, I dragged my sorry butt into school this morning, to be greeted by the slightly worrying sight of several police officers wandering about the place. Quelling my initial urge to pull out my piece and start firing, I asked my manager what was wrong; she shrugged and mournfully indicated the entrance to the teachers' room.

ZOOM IN...
broken glass on the floor

PAN UP...
gaping hole in the glass part of the door

PAN DOWN-RIGHT...
safe on the floor with the door wrenched off

ZOOM IN ON SAFE INTERIOR WITH DRAMATIC "DA-DA DAAAAH!" MUSIC
empty!

I took a moment to absorb the full horror of this egregious deed (I had been hoping for a festive Halloween corpse,) remembered where I'd been last night- in a bar, there ARE witnesses- grinned surreptitiously to myself and stepped into the room.

At this point, one of the police officers started shouting "Hairanai de! DAME!!!" (Don't go in there! NOOO!!!) However, by the presence of another teacher's jacket on a chair in the room, I figured that the precious crime scene had already been contaminated. Besides, last time I stopped for a cop, I ended up in a cell. I had great fun explaining this to the old boy in my broken Japanese.

In other Halloween news, tonight my flatmate and I are staying up watching horror movies and eating cheese in the hope of having really messed up dreams. Apologies to Mr Timothy James of Earlsdon, Coventry, for stealing his idea. The time has come.

Happy Halloween folks!

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